$ ./init --cohort=2026 --track=fullstack
16 weeks. Zero fluff. Quit the cubicle, ship production code, and land a junior dev role. No CS degree required — just grit and a terminal.
// next cohort starts in 14 days
// 8 of 24 seats remaining
01const you = {
02 status: "stuck_in_cubicle",
03 degree: null, // not required
04 drive: 100,
05};
06
07await bootcamp.compile(you, {
08 weeks: 16,
09 hours: 1200,
10 output: "junior_dev",
11});
12
13// → exit code 0. you got hired.$ node career.config.js // compiling...
// last cohort, verified by third-party audit
avg starting salary
$0K
placement rate
0%
// within 180 days of graduating
total weeks
0
hands-on hours
0+
career changers
0%
// no prior dev experience
hiring partners
0+
[x] = completed milestone [ ] = upcoming
seats filling fast
// cohort #18 — 8 of 24 seats remaining
00
days
00
hrs
00
min
00
sec
// blunt answers, no marketing speak
$ ./apply --now
The cubicle isn't getting better. 16 weeks from now you're either still scrolling job boards — or you're committing production code. Pick one.
[ submit application ]$ ./enroll --track=fullstack
✓ checking eligibility... passed
✓ reserving seat... done
! deposit required to confirm
$ _▮