Orrery — Wordmark Critique

CEDAR
WORKS

could you critique this wordmark and suggest a cleaner lockup? the letter spacing is what bugs me most

Reasoned for 54s

CEDAR WORKS

Thoughts

Parsing the request

Reading the mark

Two words set on one line, framed by a full-width rule above and a narrower rule below.
Bone-white letterforms on near-black; the tracking runs wide, around 0.1em by eye.
The lower rule stops short of the cap width, so the frame reads unfinished rather than deliberate.

Weighing revisions

The monochrome treatment is the strongest thing here — it survives at 24px and it survives embroidery.
Optical spacing beats metric spacing: D–A and W–O need a touch less than the rest.
Matching both rules to the exact cap width would resolve most of the imbalance in one move.
Dropping tracking from 0.1em to roughly 0.06em tightens the word without losing the airy feel.
Alternatively, stack the two words and let the rules bracket the block instead of the line.

Drafting the fix

Set both rules flush to the cap width and give them equal 1.5px weight for a symmetrical frame.
Rebalance the word space so it reads as one lockup rather than two competing halves.
Lift the rules to sit 0.4× cap height off the letterforms — close enough to feel attached.
Produce a single-line variant for favicons where the rules would collapse into noise anyway.